"Me" Time

     Two days after my c-section, when my OB came to visit me, I mentioned to her that I went against the nurses recommendation and showered because I needed to feel like myself; I needed to be in my own undies, pajama, having used my own soap and my toothbrush from home instead of the one the hospital gave me.She told me something that I never thought would have so much weight on me post-partum.

     She explained to me that when her husband would get home, she would give him her son and ask him to take care of the baby because she needed to go shower and feel like a human again and not a milk machine.

     On the first few days of the baby's life, showering, teeth brushing, etc became items on the back burner. My only concern was to make sure she is fed, changed, without diaper rash, clean, and in the 2-3 hours she sleeps in between, I was cleaning the house, organizing clothes, re-filling bottles and wipee warmers, etc. I was on pain meds every 4 hours without failure and was basically not eating.   In fact, in the last 2 weeks I have lost 27 pounds and no thanks to a diet, but more of a fast. My mother-in-law and mom would tell me " sigue asi que te vas a morir" (exaggeration.. because I have enough fat stored for winter lol). My husband and I were not eating and if anyone would tell us to eat, we would make a pollo tropical run.

     About a week ago though, I woke up one morning feeling totally grosse. Brianna had had a rough night and I must have slept two hours between 1:00am and 9:00am. Hubby does an amazing job of waking up with me everytime Brianna cries and he will heat up milk or get her diaper ready, etc. But all moms know that the one who wakes up 30 minutes before baby is getting ready to wake up to get the bottle warmed, the diaper and butt paste ready, and even taste test the milk to make sure it wont burn baby ( grosse i know) so that the baby does not have to wake up and start crying to be fed is mommy.

     I asked hubby to please watch baby so that I could shower! IT WAS THE BEST SHOWER OF MY LIFE!! I was able to wash my hair and face and must have scrubbed 4 times. I was then able to finally put on regular clothes and not go from pajama to pajama. The shower lasted 30 minutes as opposed to the 5 minute shower I take with the monitor inside the bathroom and peeking through the curtain every 30 seconds to see if Brianna is moving.

     This has become a daily routine. Hubby watches Brianna and I have an hour to shower, shave, pluck my eyebrows, iron my hair, or do whatever I want. I can put on regular clothes and even, MAKE-UP, believe it or not. I can paint my nails or remove nail polish, try on clothes to see what fits or doesnt fit, and then take a 30 minute nap.


     As moms I think we get so lost and entangled with our babies that we lose ourselves. As part of recovery, I think feeling good is as important as rest. After having a baby, you have a totally different body than you did before baby and its important to be able to look in the mirror and feel decent/pretty. Before I was a mom, I was a wife, and its not fair to me, baby, or husband to be a total rag and not take care of myself in trying to take care of everyone and everything else.